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Funny Money: 5 Ways to Recession-proof Your Life

You can kick butt in good times AND bad. The key? Steps you take NOW to recession-proof your life and income. Do you have a plan in the event you lose your job? If not, this is required reading.

Kimberly Palmer is the author of a new book on ways to recession-proof your life.You may feel young and invincible. You survived the last recession, but don’t get all cocky. The next recession is out there, ready to topple your financial castle like the angriest of birds, leaving only broken dreams and crushed piggy banks in its wake.

If only there were a way to recession-proof your life.

Hark! Here comes one.

Personal finance author extraordinaire Kimberly Palmer claims to be able to do just that in her upcoming book, The Economy of You. Click on the link and you’ll see the claim, right there at the top of the cover: “Discover Your Inner Entrepreneur and Recession-Proof Your Life.”

Even better than the existence of “recession-proofing” is this very post you happen to be reading. That’s because I managed to exploit Palmer’s willingness to promote her book and gotten her to give away five ways to do that recession-proofing without having to pay for or read her book! And better still, I have also translated Palmer’s advice from authorspeak to no-punches-pulled, unpublishable (except for her) straight talk.

Ready to recession proof? Off we go, with Palmer’s five ways to prevent the recession monster from darkening your door:

1. Launch a side-business.

“No one can guarantee their job today. That’s why we all need more than one source of income. Building a side-hustle on top of a full-time job can give you the safety net you need in case your full-time job suddenly disappears. In the meantime, it offers a way to bring in some extra cash while you find your entrepreneurial footing.”

Translation: Use your vast knowledge from your previous career as a chemistry expert to concoct the best crystal meth New Mexico has ever seen. Quit your teaching job, beat cancer and become a criminal overlord. But watch out for your brother-in-law, who will try to mess up your plans. That, or break good and do something legal, like sell stuff on Etsy. Either or.

This goes along with Money Under 30’s longstanding advice to find ways earn more money.

2. Minimize your costs.

“Before launching any business – or making any big life change – you want to make sure your finances are in order. Pay off debt, organize your various accounts, develop a retirement savings plan – if you’re on top of your money, it’s easier to concentrate on growing your income.”

Translation: Stop wasting your money on superfluous things like giving to charity or your heating bill, and concentrate on solid investments for retirement such as building up an awesome video game collection like this guy.

3. Find your online tribe.

“No one can find success alone. We need the support of friends, allies, and online support networks. That’s why finding and following people building similar types of businesses to your own can be a great way to make connections that end up connecting you to your own target audience.”

Translation: You have no marketable skills or distinguishing talents, so you are forced to worm your way to success by making friends with people with potential, then exploiting those relationships to maximum profit.

4. Accept failure (and keep going).

“Failure is an inevitable part of trying new things, especially building a business. Developing a thick skin, and a way to deal with the down days, whether it’s by calling a friend who can remind you of what motivates you or scrolling through positive feedback emails, we all need a feel-good strategy.”

Translation: So what if your first few thousand weeks of trying to win the lottery or efforts to make the Olympic bobsled team haven’t worked out so well? Keep trying, darn it! Fortune favors the bold. As does misfortune, but at least misfortune is a type of fortune.

5. Help other people.

“When the product or service you’re selling helps other people, it’s much easier to promote it. And since all products or services should make their recipients’ lives better – after all, why else would they bother purchasing them? – then it shouldn’t be too hard to define just how your side-gig helps other people. Spelling it out makes it easier to spread word about what you’re selling.

“That way, you’re not only creating greater financial security for yourself by recession-proofing your own life, but you’re also improving other people’s lives along the way. And what could be better than that?”

Translation: Try and think of something that will trick the dumb into thinking they need it, helping them to unload their collective funds into your enterprise, then create that thing and ride it to profit and glory. Whatever you do, do not create the Segway or Samsung Galaxy Gear.

Want to learn more? Here’s the link again to Kimberly’s book, “The Economy of You”.

Published or updated on January 10, 2014

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About Phil Villarreal

Phil Villarreal writes Funny Money weekly for Money Under 30. He lives in Tucson and works for the Arizona Daily Star. He's also an author, blogger and Twitterer.


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  1. […] Recession-proof Your Life: 5 Ways according to Kimberly Palmer […]

  2. Joe says:

    Thank you for these nice advises. If you have available money to spend, plan and safeguard your future, you probably feel rich no matter what the economic conditions are. It is a great advice to find like minded people to encourage you more.

  3. […] Here we have some really good advice and some satire. You pick which is which. Funny Money: 5 Ways to Recession-proof Your Life (Money Under 30) […]

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